Lots Of Love (2)

so, i mentioned about super friend right?

then, another female who changed my life. (yeah, i like exaggerating.XD) actually, i still didnt know the exact reason why did she refuse to talk to me for more than one year. but thats not the point. the point is, we are also bff now. :D i need to thank her, for teaching me to be 专一 and patience.

next, i made a decision which i believe, had reversed my secondary school life. I SHOULDNT HAD STOPPED DEBATING. yeah, i'll probably repeating this for numerous times in my life. BUT, as i said in the previous post, i didnt regret. because this decision brought me into different areas. which includes organizing events and competitions. i would like to thank everyone who taught me and gave me chance to perform during this period of time.

(to be cont again...)
(sorry la. or i'll overdose of love)

Lots Of Love

it's funny when you look backwards and think about stuffs you did while you're in primary. try to think, your 'first love'? haha.. actions that you thought were right and suitable that time seems more than childish when you look it in your perspective now.

yeah, we do funny things. and we'll find it out sooner or later. and the specialty of life is that we live it as ourselves. and the imperfections of life often comes out as the best part of it. so, i never should've regretted for anything i did. it may had cause unwanted changes in my life, but 塞翁失马，焉知非福？ and now, i'm happy with my current life, so why complain?

i have a girl friend who we used to be super friend. what we call puppy love. yeah, that kind. although we did nothing at all during that time of our life, but we seem to have a special bond. even we didnt talked to each others for months, we still can chat like hell and ignore others. for her, i can go through all those super mafan procedure to like a video in a like page. for nothing but just plain support. with her, we can eat and chat in the canteen together and laugh like nobody's around.

with her, i feel like i'm the 12 years old boy again. when we line up in the canteen to buy a 20cent jelly stick. when we buy mango gummies and put into our bottles to make DIY mango juice. when we eat lunch together every single afternoon. how i miss those days...

(to be cont...)

What do I want?

biao yan sai today was awesome. to be honest, after not debating for literally years, i find my performance today was actually acceptable. although still bad in point wise, but the sense on stage was lovely. it feels good to hear the applauses. nothing bad to feel back this feeling once in a while. but i certainly understand the fact that there are things that is more important for me.

the fact that i need to find a way to switzerland, hopefully ehl. the fact that i need to have the 'personality' that is 'suitable' for hospitality studies. the fact that swiss franc is abt 3 times to ringgit. the fact that i may not be studying form 6 anymore. the fact that i may need to work for few years before enrolling my masters.

i have big dreams. dreams that i wanted to realize it so much i can spent hours planning. but dreams may crashes at some point. this is where sacrifices come into play. have to set my priorities right.

but what is important to me?

to live a successful life? define successful dude.
to live a happy life? define happy dude.
to live a trouble-less life? you sound so irresponsible dude.

hard to deny that the thinking that a man should bear larger responsibilities in a family to support the family economically. i dont want to mess up my life for some movies, some girls, some interests... yes i sound so stubborn in this i-want-to-success stuff, but sorry, you're not my aim in life.

okay, i dont actually understand what this whole thing meant.
*this is just for relief purposes*

当冬夜渐暖

乱到~ 真的是啊。

为什么日子不能过得像以前那样呢？
为什么心里那个疙瘩就是放不下呢？
为什么我们之间会充满猜疑呢？
为什么不可以坦白地讲一切公开呢？
为什么会害怕坦诚呢？
为什么我会联想到阴险与计谋呢？
为什么一切都变质了呢？
为什么呢？

忙

考试要到了啊。。。还没有收拾心情读书叻~一连串的事情搞不完，丢~

我不知道的事

我从不知道。原来我真的在意。

在意你们的一句祝福，在意你们的一个反应，在意你们的一举一动。

反而有些事，我却不在意。

不在意所谓的礼物，不在意过分的玩笑，不在意给你们简单的一句祝福。

发现到，我非常容易满足。非常容易被打动。非常容易被说服。

简单的一段对话。
一小块Mango Delight。
甚至是一个眼神。

虽然有点夸张。。。

人在荷尔蒙失调时，总会胡思乱想兼胡言乱语。

尤其是当，
爱人结婚了，新郎不是我。

他奶奶的！

他妈的！看低我？我干你老母臭鸡百！

什么叫POPULAR的人才应该在PROM的COMMITTEE？！

我干你老母臭鸡百！狗眼看人低的鸟人！ 那是什么他妈的“我接受唔到咯”的表情？！我插你老母臭鸡百！

他奶奶的！